Pinkies Up Bundle
You know what I'm talking about. If you want to be FANCY, put your pinky up. And this shit right here is FAN. CEE. This is what Camilla Parker Bowles Manstealer Windsor the Eighth uses to wipe up Corgi pee when mummy-in-law comes to visit. So, what British royalty considers to be the equivalent of cut-rate paper towels is actually fancy-schmancy rich people stuff over here in the U. S. of A. So, be fancy. And schmancy. And put your damn pinky up—you look like a commoner.
6 half-yards. The flower prints all seem to be Coventry by Hoffman and the green pebbles and the stripe are P&B or Timeless Treasures or something like that. Fancy, though.
Pinkies Up Half Yard Bundle: $20.00 + $9.00 shipping
Lake Trout Sandwich Bundle
These are all (or mostly, anyway) from the Baltimore Beauties collection by P&B Textiles. Did you know that up in Baltimore, if you see a place that sells Lake Trout Sandwiches, it's not really lake trout? It's Atlantic whiting or something, but it's a Baltimore thing to call it lake trout. They just fry it up in cornmeal and slap it on some white bread with hot sauce and wrap it in foil. ITS AWESOME. So if I ever make a Baltimore album quilt, it's not gonna have birdies and hearts on it. It'll be all John Waters and Lake Trout and Omar Little. I love me some Charm City. 6 half-yard cuts.
Lake Trout Half Yard Bundle: $20.00 + $9.00 shipping
Chintz But Not Chintzy Bundle
Are these chintz? How do you identify chintz anyway? Is it like obscenity— the Supreme Court knows it when it sees it? Do you think we could get Scalia to make a ruling on whether this is chintz? What would a constitutional originalist's opinion on a bunch of Marcus Brothers and Moda Fabrics be? I guess as long as the corporations get lots of tax breaks, he'd be cool with it. 5 half-yard cuts.
Chintz But Not Chintzy Half-Yard Bundle: $14.00 + $9.00 shipping
I Don't Even Know; It's Just Pretty Bundle
This is another one of those bundles that is really, really lovely, but I'll just never use them. Those two grey-ish blue ones in the top left and middle. LOVE THEM. In theory. But they're all sweet and pretty and I am hardly sweet and pretty. But you are. No, you are! I'm not just saying that. I would kill to have your hair. You should have these. They go with your hair.
7 half-yard cuts from Sweet Romance by Blackbird Designs for Moda.
It's Just Pretty Half Yard Bundle: $24 + $9.00 shipping
Authentic by Moda Half-Yard Bundle
Anyway. Authentic. I'm still keeping some for me, but I want you to have some. 6 half-yard cuts.
Authentic by Sweetwater for Moda Bundle: $25.00 + 9.00 shipping
This Is How Much I Love You Bundle
Because I love you so much, and because I need money, I am cutting into my beloved Jane Sassaman stash. See that one on the bottom in the middle? That's Teasels and Lace from Prairie Gothic. Do you know how much I love that fabric? This much:
And this much:
That's hanging in my sewing room. I have, like, 6 yards of it at least. And if I find more, I'll buy it. But I'll let you have a half-yard of it, because, as I said, I love you.
6 half-yard cuts of Prairie Gothic with one Sunshine and Shadow (Purse, couch, and Ikea frame not included).
This Is How Much I Love You Bundle: $18.00 + $9.00 shipping
Priceless Treasure Bundle
Yeah, that's right. Fantastic Felines by Laurel Burch. Do you know how much this goes for on eBay? A LOT. And do you know how much of it I have? A LOT. But I only cut into what I have multiple yards of. And I'm only selling one half-yard bundle. Because I'm going to hoard the rest like a crazy cat lady, even though I don't actually like cats very much. I'm more of a dog person. But you know who does like cats? My mother-in-law. Someday, the MIL will have a cat quilt. A very valuable cat quilt. And I bet I'll still be able to sell the scraps for twenty bucks an inch. 6 half-yards. (And, yes, that's a lot of money for 6 half yards. It's rare. I've seen it on eBay for $10 and more for a fat quarter. I'll also throw in a copy of Generation Q Magazine and a picture of Joe Manganiello that I printed off the internet! Never say that I don't take care of my people.) Plus, I'll give you this:
Priceless Treasure Bundle: $40.00 + 9.00 shipping