Friday, April 1, 2016

A new direction

I've been spending a lot of time observing my fellow members of the Quilt Industrial Complex, and one thing I've definitely noticed is that branding is totally in right now. You are a big luh-hoo-zer if you are not creating, cultivating, and expanding your own personal brand. Basically, it's a sex tape world and we are all Kardashians now.

When I started out as a quilt blogger in, god help me, 2008, I chose the name The Bitchy Stitcher because, well, I thought it was funny and I never thought anyone would actually read me. As the years have passed, I have become less enamored with that name as well as with quilting in general. I mean, remember the deer craze? Do you know what the new deer is going to be? Bunnies. Fucking bunnies. In a world of axolotls, nudibranchs, and water bears, we get bunnies? Is anyone even trying anymore?

There was a time when quilting meant everything to me, but I've been thinking recently about what truly feeds my soul. What nourishes my psyche, what completes me and makes me feel whole? (I mean besides Tom Hiddleston movies.) There's really only one answer.


Good god, I love to eat. I mean, have you had really good eggs Benedict? There's not a damn bunny in the world that measures up to that. Given the choice between spending $150 bucks on a fabulous meal at a four-star restaurant or on a fat quarter of Tula Pink fabric from 2013, I'm gonna have to go with the num-nums at this point.

So, I think it's time to shift my focus, clarify my priorities, and rebrand my ass. I'm done with The Bitchy Stitcher. It's been a great ride, but it's time to move forward and follow my bliss. From now on, I will be known as:

I will be offering plenty of recipes that are essentially taken directly from published cookbooks, but which have been re-worded slightly to make them my own. For example, wherever a recipe calls for milk, I will call it "some of that sweet motherfuckin' moo juice." Because this will indicate that I am edgy and transgressive.

I will offer lots of long-winded, stream-of-consciousness meditations on the nature of butter and the essence of smoked paprika, as well as plenty of dubious science with links to "studies" that show the way to eternal youth and vitality is to mainline lacinato kale until you pass out.

Be sure to follow me on social media as well, as I will be Instagramming my dinner every day ay 6:30 pm sharp.

As always, thank you all for your support, and be on the lookout for my first cookbook, Crepes n' Crap, in a bookstore near you.

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