It beats heavy drinking

So, for oh NO REASON, I've been contemplating the various ways that someone, not me, might go about coping with massive toddler tantrums that seem to be happening on a daily basis, quite possibly the result of putting said toddler in daycare so that someone, not me, CAN HAVE A LIFE. My own almost-6-year old had her share of meltdowns everyday after I picked her up from daycare when she was about this age, but they were not as...rough? Horrible? Cataclysmic? Apocalyptic?

Okay. It's me.

The best advice I have found says to basically ignore the tantrum, because then they learn that pitching a fit doesn't garner them more attention or get them what they're screaming for. But how do you ignore a child who is not only screaming and crying and demanding something totally unreasonable, but is also clinging to you, climbing up your legs and holding on to your neck in a desperate attempt to get and keep your attention?

So, I'm thinking that next time, I'm either going to put my fingers in my ears, close my eyes, and go, "LA, LA, LA, LA! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!!!" or I'm going to channel all my anger and frustration into learning applique so that I can work on a lovely quilt with appliqued letters that spell out "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SHUT THE FUCK UP. P.S. I LOVE YOU. MOMMY"